With Mothers Day coming upon us…we might reflect
on the type of mother we are in comparison to our own mothers,
grandmothers. It may be hard for some people to be honest about this.
Many will unconditionally reverence their mothers. But for quite a
number of people, in fact, 58% of those recently polled in an online
survey believed that they are, in fact, better moms than their own
mother. Only 23% admitted that they are not better at "mommy Dom". While the other 20% polled were still on the fence.
Safe to say, the overwhelming majority of those polled most likely
have a fairly good relationship with their mothers. So, why would they
think that they are "better" at mothering? One reason
is that people form their own ideals, regardless of what others around
them believe. While you may be influenced heavily by your familial
norms and roll models, you also have a network outside of your family.
These people also play a part in how you form your personal belief
system. So, in essence, some things that you believe were not,
necessarily, believed or taught to you by your mother. The exact
opposite may actually be true. Your beliefs may be completely counter
to your mother's.
Another factor in our overall parental skills is how we perceived our parents. If you believed that your mother was "perfect",
then chances are, she may still be perfect in your eyes and you may
feel that you will never measure up. This is completely normal. For
those people, their mother may be their hero, and her beliefs regarding
child-rearing take precedent. For me it was my grandmother, the one
that I learned the most from on loving and caring for a family.
Then, there is a group that loves their mother, but may only follow her lead on certain things. Of times, opting for a "best practices"
approach. They may not consider themselves "better", and would not even
consider the competitiveness involved with making that type of
There are many reasons why some may feel that they are better. Many
have had better educational opportunities than their mother. Many have
been afforded advantages that their mother could only have dreamed
about at their age. Some just believe that their mother could never be
as "cool" as they are or as they feel they are perceived by their children. They may feel that they "understand" children better. There may be some truth to that; however, your mother may not have wanted to have that type of "friendly" relationship with you. Maybe she just wanted to be your mother, and not your friend.
Who is to really say who is better? At the end of the day, those who
think that they are better should absolutely think about this...You
could not have been better if you never existed. Love your mother. For
better or for worse, that wonderful woman helped to make you who you
are today. With Mothers day coming upon us, remember the mothers and
women that have influence you in your life and honor them for their
efforts and love in trying to be the best they could be in your life.
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